EP 90: Inner Child Meets the Wild West: How a Trip with My Dad Shifted Everything
Reclaiming Peace: A Soulful Trip to Monument Valley
This past week, I returned from a trip that deeply touched my heart—a journey to Monument Valley with my father and one of my sisters. This wasn’t just any vacation. It was the fulfillment of a quiet, long-held dream of my dad’s. A dream rooted in his love for Westerns, horses, and the freedom he once knew as a young boy on horseback. But this story is about more than checking off a bucket list item. It’s about healing across generations, reclaiming peace, and creating new memories built on love and understanding.
The Landscape That Mirrors the Soul
If you've ever seen a Western movie, chances are you've caught a glimpse of Monument Valley—its striking red mesas and sacred, expansive land. But photos don’t quite capture the soul-stirring presence of actually being there. For my father, who grew up watching Westerns and still finds solace in weekly horseback rides, this place felt like a homecoming. A place that spoke directly to his inner child.
Watching him ride through the valley on a Mustang—wind in his hair, shoulders relaxed, heart full—I found myself holding back tears. It wasn’t just joy. It was witnessing freedom. Not the kind that comes from escaping, but the kind that comes from arriving—in your body, your spirit, and your truth.
Healing the Father-Daughter Dynamic
There was a time when a trip like this would have triggered old wounds. For much of my life, my relationship with my dad was complicated. Years of navigating his struggles with sobriety, emotional distance, and the impact of generational trauma made our bond feel fragile at times. But this trip? It was different. Because I’ve done the work—deep healing, therapy, somatic practices, and especially breathwork—that allowed me to meet him not from my wounded inner child, but from my grounded adult self.
And for the first time, I saw him not just as my dad but as a human being who has lived through his own pain.
Panic, Fear, and the Legacy of Trauma
During our six-hour drive through the Arizona desert, we had an honest, vulnerable conversation I’ll never forget. I asked him what moments in his life stood out as joyful. His answer surprised me—he couldn’t name one right away. Instead, he shared that much of his life has been shaped by panic and fear. From childhood memories of his body trembling without understanding why (what I now understand were likely panic attacks) to the impact of growing up with a mother who also suffered from anxiety and depression, his nervous system never truly knew safety.
This conversation gave me deeper insight—not only into his story but into the ripple effects of inherited trauma. Through the lens of epigenetics, it’s clear how patterns of fear, anxiety, and survival-mode behavior can be passed down, even without words. And it affirmed why healing matters so much.
Because when we choose to heal, we’re not just doing it for ourselves—we’re shifting the narrative for our entire lineage.
Inner Child Healing and the Power of Presence
Ten years ago, this trip would have felt impossible. I would have been on edge, anticipating conflict, bracing for emotional discomfort. But breathwork and inner healing changed that. It taught me how to regulate my nervous system, how to release the trauma held in my body, and how to come home to myself.
Because of this work, I could fully enjoy my father’s joy—without getting pulled into the past.
My inner child, who once lived in fear of his anger or absence, now feels safe. She watched as her father smiled, rode freely, and received love—perhaps in ways he’d never allowed himself to before. And that’s something worth celebrating.
Shifting the Family Dynamic
In many ways, this trip was a turning point. Not just for me and my dad, but for how I understand our family dynamic. From learning about his experiences with emotional neglect and conditional love to seeing anxiety manifest now in younger generations like my nephew, it was clear how urgently we need healing—not just individually, but as a family system.
And while I know not everyone in my family is ready for this work (my mom, for example, still resists it), I’ve come to accept that healing can start with one. One person doing the inner work. One person choosing a different path. One person saying: the cycle ends here.
When You Do the Work, the Work Works
I’m proud of the healing I’ve done. And I’m proud of how it allowed me to give my dad a gift that was about more than just a trip. It was about dignity. About being seen and celebrated. About riding into a landscape of sacred earth and new beginnings.
If you’ve been walking your own healing path—especially if you grew up with emotionally unavailable or alcoholic parents—please know this: your healing matters. It’s not always pretty or easy. But the peace that’s waiting for you on the other side? It’s real. And it’s worth every step.
Ready to Reclaim Your Inner Peace?
If you’ve been doing this work and still feel like you’re stuck in survival mode, I invite you to work with me 1:1. My four-month private coaching program combines deep healing, somatic practices like breathwork, life coaching, and even business coaching (for those pursuing bigger goals).
We begin with emotional regulation and nervous system work, then move into building a life that feels aligned with your values and desires.
👉 Book a 1:1 clarity call with me to explore if this path is right for you.
Join Me in Sedona This October
I also have one shared room with a private bath and three weekend passes left for my upcoming healing retreat in Sedona. If the sacred energy of Monument Valley calls to you, Sedona will speak to your soul, too.
Surround yourself with beauty, community, and transformation. Let this be your next step into peace, freedom, and deeper healing.
WORK WITH ANA:
1:1 Coaching – Success Beyond Success
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